I’ve said it before and I will say it again.

Giving birth feels like the worst constipation you will ever have. You push that baby like the biggest poop you will ever experience. He/she is a little shit before they even get out. (I mean that in the nicest/most loving way possible.)

But what about during pregnancy? For everyone it is different, but this is my poopy pregnancy story.

Pre-pregnancy I had a very healthy bowel movement at least every other day. When I got pregnant, all of that changed. I clogged up, big time. Not to mention all the color changes. I look back now and think how this prepared me for the big day.

While you’re pregnant, your doctor will let you know which laxatives you are allowed to take. Mine was on that long list of medications I would be allowed to take for various issues. It’s a short list and all the medications on it suck ass. You can’t take anything good while pregnant and if you get sick, it is the worst.

But I digress.

I was home alone one day and it had probably been about 3 days since my last bowel movement, which for me was a long time. I was bloated, uncomfortable and irritated. When I got my body’s signal that it was time to go, I was thrilled. Finally. About time.

I seriously sat there for 20 minutes in pain. Crying. It hurt so bad I called my husband at work and told him I didn’t know what to do and that it was stuck.

** Note to men: this will not be the grossest/weirdest thing during pregnancy so if you can’t handle this then suck it up.

Thankfully my husband (who still closes the door when he poops even after almost 9 years of marriage) was so sweet. He not only answered the phone, but also in the calmest tone ever suggested a bath and promised to pick up Mini Wheats on the way home.

Mini Wheats fixed me every time. It was my “go-to” for this issue. I highly recommend all pregnant women at least try it.

Since he was at work that was all he had time to say. I was on my own again. I reluctantly stood up, walked to the kitchen (still in pain) to get more water. I chugged the entire 20 ounces. I continued walking around for a few minutes. I wasn’t going to take a bath… that just seemed like a weird idea and I didn’t feel like going through all the trouble for something so stupid. I sat back down on the toilet for another 20 minutes. I started crying and panicking all over. My body was shaking uncontrollably and I was miserable. This was one of the MANY times during this journey I needed my mom. I am 26 and was texting my mom because I was constipated. Sounds so dumb now, but at the time I didn’t want to be alone.

My mom told me that was just part of pregnancy and that it would get better. I love that my mom was sweet about it, too.

** Another note to men: if your baby’s momma is going through something like this, it is NOT the time for jokes. Keep them to yourself until she is ready to laugh about it later.

At the end of the last 20 minutes it was all over and I was exhausted mentally and physically. I actually got really scared about giving birth at that point. I was never fearful of the pain of birth. I was afraid of losing control. Afraid of not being in control of what my body was doing, which is stupid because it is what the female body is designed to do.

Fast-forward a few months and sure enough, it was a repeat all over again. But this time it resulted in my beautiful baby boy being born. Being able to be held in my arms.

I was so glad my body put me through that. It was like it was testing me. Like it was trying to prepare me for what was to come.

A lot of women fear pooping during pregnancy, but keep in mind that the doctors don’t care because it is so common. Plus, that isn’t even the weirdest/grossest thing that happens during birth, so get ready! I was covered in my fluids 10 hours before the pushing even started.

I didn’t end up pooping, but I sure wish I did. You don’t know when you will finally poop again. It took me a week before even a little poop, and that was with the help of the laxative (doctor ok’d me) Colace. I still use it periodically three months later. I think breastfeeding is the culprit, but I haven’t cared enough to look it up or ask.


Is there something I left out that women should know? Want to share your story? Comment below.

The Bowels of Pregnancy
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