I Don’t Want to Be a Mom Today

Every day I wake up gung-ho about having a positive day.

That’s great and all, but it never guarantees a stress-free day. By “stress-free” I mean a manageable day that doesn’t result in me wanting to just go to bed and try again tomorrow.

We are very fortunate that my husband’s job allows me to be a stay-at-home mom. I am very grateful for that; however, being a stay-at-home mom is so much harder than my job. I try to pick up at least 8 hours a week at my job just so I can get a break.

Work is like a vacation. I actually get to have stimulating adult conversations there with people who are old enough to talk back!

It is very easy for me to get discouraged on “rough” days.

Before getting pregnant, I had an idea of what those rough days would be like. Crying, screaming, little to no sleep, messy house, no time with my husband, etc… I wasn’t wrong, but I wasn’t right either. Let me explain.

What I thought would describe rough days actually details what I consider to be the better days.

I love being a mom, but I also love being me. I like being able to shower, exercise, read books, etc… It isn’t that I don’t get to do those things, it’s that I don’t get to do them on my terms anymore, and when I do get to do them I am on a countdown. 

Life when you have a baby turns into a constant countdown. 

Today was one of those rough days. Little Sir was so fussy that I just didn’t know what I could do. Of course I went through the “I’m Desperate List.”

  1. Boob?
  2. Teething?
  3. Bored?
  4. Tired?
  5. Now boob?
  6. Look at the cool toy!
  7. Outside? (He loves outside)
  8. Now tired?
  9. You sure you don’t want boob?

You get the drill. So none of these worked. So I gave up or some might say gave in. 

I hate the negative connotation that is attached to “give up.” Sometimes it isn’t a bad thing. In this situation me giving up any optimistic hope of taking a shower, getting work done or exercising was freeing. It stopped me from stressing out. When I put those aside in my TBA mind folder, I was able to calm down and take a nap with Little Sir. I was tired anyways and at least I would be doing something I consider as a mom to be productive.

Yes, napping as a mom is absolutely productive. So suck it haters.

If nothing else makes Little Sir stop being fussy, it is time to try bedtime boob. How is this different than normal boob? Since we co-sleep, I lay down a burp cloth and let him eat while I lay down as well. Only twice in his 5 months of life has this not worked. It’s a last-ditch effort for my sanity.

At first I read, a great way to get my mind off of what I am perceiving as my own pathetic life and delve into someone else’s screwed up path. 

(Currently I am on Chapter 5 of Say Goodbye by Lisa Gardner)

I don’t like to read “smart” books. The less I have to think the better. I don’t want to have to look up words and I don’t want to be taught something. Just a fun/thrilling storyline that gives me what I call a “brain break.”

Not wanting to be a mom for a day isn’t the same as me regretting my decision. I don’t regret one second. Ever. Like I said earlier, I love being a mom, but that doesn’t mean I have to always be my happy-go-lucky-chipper self. Being a mom is hard. It is often a struggle that you have to overcome. Your baby is actually a tiny human and that future voter is just as fickle as you are. They just can’t communicate their needs or wants as well as you can and that is incredibly frustrating and stressful. 

So when I have a really rough day, my solution is to give up. And when I gave up today I got to read, nap and when I woke up with a clearer mind I ended up getting to shower.

Is your child fed? Does your child have a clean diaper? Despite the current crying episode, are they overall a happy kid who smiles often?

If all of these are a yes, then take a deep breath and remember tomorrow is another day. Maybe tomorrow you can get shit done, but for today forget about it.

What do you do when the day just isn’t going your way? How do you handle it?

DIY Chalkboard by Meagan

My friend, Meagan Green, has been leading an exceptionally crafty lifestyle as of recent! Here is one of her latest projects and it doesn’t require ANY expensive tools! Cute and affordable? Yes, please!

Here is her DIY Chalkboard Post:

Alright so my mother in law and I are making a headboard for her house which lead us to buy some compressed hardwood board… we only needed a small amount so after a moment of contemplation and several Pinterest ideas floating through my head, I realized we had enough wood left to make not only one but two chalkboards. Hardwood for those of you who don’t know is a board with a smooth-textured surface that will accept paint, basically composed of super compressed wood with an ultra smooth surface. Perfect for a chalkboard! 

So since we were at home depot and my husband doesn’t allow me to use power tools without adult supervision, we had the wood cutting associate cut us two pieces out of our rather large scrap from the headboard. Mine measured 30″×45″. Typically the board costs $10.80 ish so you could always get a mommy friend to go in with you and save a few bucks. Or make two for your home!!! 

Now being a crafter, I had chalkboard paint hanging out in our barn that I used prior to this on another project but most places (Walmart is the cheapest) has some. You don’t need much honestly. A small 3 oz. bottle is plenty or the smallest you can find. You will also need a small foam roller for the application (you are looking for super smooth finish so a FOAM roller is necessary) this cost $3.80 ish at Walmart as well. 

Painting is (I’m sure) simple and self explanatory. Mine took 3 coats with the roller. Now chalkboard paint dries quickly,  mine was completely set in 30 minutes after each coat. 

Then I made a trip back to home depot to pick out crown molding. I am a freak about trimming everything in white. Now my mother in law I believe will be doing hers in a simple wood frame but I went for crown molding and rosette squares. The squares were $1.59 each (4 total) and the crown molding was $1.15/ft. Now the nice thing about home depot is they cut everything for you. Lowes has given me issues with cuts in the past so I drive the extra distance to Home Depot. This Home Depot happened to have a self cutting area with the crown molding so we used them and cut two the same length as the top, 30 in. and two the same as the sides 45 in. thus allowing it to frame the chalkboard and become flush with the rosette squares in each corner. 

I also picked up some finishing nails and headed home. From there it was simple. I made sure the board was level.. nailed in the finishing nails and crown molding and finished with the rosette squares. And tada…  a large chalkboard for tons of fun (and milestone announcement photos for Mommy). Mommy can’t wait to take pregnancy photos with this chalkboard!!!

All for less than a $50. 

Hope you enjoyed! Happy crafting!

-Meagan Green
Owner, M and M Bangles, Outbacker, and proud Mommy

** Guest bloggers will not be censored so their views are their own and may not reflect upon mine.

Comments and Questions? Write below!

Labor isn’t the Worst

So you are pregnant and completely frightened for the dreaded experience of (dun dun dun) labor.

Some women compare how long they went through labor.
“I labored for 72 hours.”
“Well, I labored for 73.”
We get it. It sucked.

Other women say they don’t remember the pain at all! That once that bouncing bundle of joy (their words not mine) comes out, you forget all about it.
Yeah, right. I wish. Then again tried to remember it just because of this common statement.

Once the baby was out, I was overjoyed. Not at the sight of my baby, but at the fact I could finally get some sleep. That 5 minute power nap felt like 8 hours and it was miraculous.

Then you bring the baby home and you realize that now this little human is a permanent fixture in your household. Don’t get me wrong. They are so totally precious, but so was the time you used to get to yourself.

During the newborn stage I was exhausted, wondering if I was doing things correctly, hoping that my son would quickly get over eating every hour. Yes, every hour. Not 2-4 like they tell you. Every. Hour.

Diapers aren’t nearly as bad as I expected. That was the easiest part of taking care of him. Didn’t take any thought.

The tough part is trying to make your baby happy and trying to make yourself happy. That includes trying to avoid Cabin Fever

So no. Labor isn’t the worst part. The months following are so much harder and last so much longer. It is a battle to juggle life when a little human gets thrown into a mix. Especially a little human that cannot feed themselves or entertain themselves.

Have no fear. They are 3 months old before you know it and then they will laugh and play and your worries wash away. They are the cutest thing and you can’t help but love them through all the tears.

It is still all TOTALLY worth it. Just know what you are getting into and you have better odds at facing it positively.

I’m sure I will update this when my son becomes a toddler… maybe the title will be: “Newborns aren’t the Worst”

Do you agree that labor isn’t all that bad in the big scheme of things? Comment below.

What NOT to Say to a Pregnant Woman

A lot of strangers will ask you about your pregnancy. I got this a lot at work. These are all questions I was asked and how I wish I could have responded without getting fired.

“Are you married?”
– “No. It isn’t legal here yet.”
– “It was a one night stand on a cruise in my cabin. I didn’t even get his name.”

“Are you pregnant?”
– “I was. Lost the baby yesterday.”
– “Yes! Unfortunately it’s twins. I hope they hash it out like sharks. Rawr.”

“You’re carrying low. It must be a boy.”
– “Dammit! We wanted it to be a surprise!”
– “Well then I guess he’s going to hate his name. (Talking to belly) Isn’t that right Penelope?”

“When are you due?”
– “Huh? Oh! What do I do? I’m currently unemployed.”

“Can I touch your belly?”
– “If you want… I had a really big lunch and you can feel it digesting.”
– “Can I touch yours?”

“Is your husband excited.”
– “No. His favorite things are sleep and sex. So his life’s about to suck.”

“Was it planned.”
– “No, but my abortion is.”

What are some crazy thing people asked you and did you handle it? Comment below.